Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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