You're completely useless in the revolution.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
