apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
