Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
We left the knife in your bed.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
