i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
