she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I came so hard my ears popped.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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