ADVERTISEMENT

• (917): View more from New York City

  i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing

  Fav 21 5657 2239

  share tweet
  

• (352): View more from Florida

  Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.

  Fav 26 7125 1848

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love

  Fav 15 5769 1359

  share tweet
  

• (301): View more from Maryland

  My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.

  Fav 7 3474 1367

  share tweet
  
• 

  23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"

  Fav 3 2163 1150

  share tweet
  

• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.

  Fav 7 2412 911

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (248): View more from Michigan

  The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children

  Fav 6 4758 1165

  share tweet
  

• (907): View more from Alaska

  Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room

  Fav 11 1146 2017

  share tweet
  

• (904): View more from Florida

  after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste

  Fav 3 1218 766

  share tweet
  
• 

  These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (307): View more from Wyoming

  It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"

  Fav 7 863 1513

  share tweet
  

• (219): View more from Indiana

  N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..

  Fav 4 836 1098

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (515): View more from Iowa

  We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.

  Fav 6 808 535

  share tweet
  

• (732): View more from New Jersey

  It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants

  Fav 1 471 543

  share tweet
  

• (317): View more from Indiana

  i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage

  Fav 3 948 517

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (440): View more from Ohio

  They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.

  Fav 1 130 9

  share tweet
  

Randomize