i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
