TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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