glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
My ass is underappreciated
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize
