Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
