how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
i've created a new STD.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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