wrigley field is MILF paradise
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Randomize
