Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
