"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
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