Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
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