So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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