The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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