Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
