i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
