Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
dude i'm inner monologue high
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
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we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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