1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
I'm really into asian looking animals
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I think I just sharted jello shots
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
