I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
