why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Randomize