But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Can i not drive my cunt home
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
