There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize