Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where are you?
Hypothermia
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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