I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Barsexuality is the new black.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
