Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize