Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
