Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
