that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
