the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
