wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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