Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Randomize
