My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize
