Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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