It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
