why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
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