The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
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If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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