just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
