i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize
