Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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