I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
