Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize