Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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