yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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