So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Randomize
