Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
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