I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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