If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
